Fallen Maple
by Canadian Reaper
Summary: Matthew has finally given up on life when the voice in his head finally convinces him that is family would better off with out him.
1. Chapter 1

_**I don't own April Raintree or Hetalia this is my first fanfic so tell me what you think and if I need to l work on anything this was originaly a school project after we read April Raintree we wrote a first person story from Aprils view as if she never went into foster care and this is my story with the characters changed to FACE family and other Hetalia cast **_

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_**Fallen Maple**_

_Dear: Whoever_

_Whoever is reading I want you to know who I am, or at least who I was. I was Matthew Williams an older brother to Alfred Jones. Moreover, I'm what someone would call a forgotten child, what I mean by that is that I'm the one who gets the blame. Also, I'm the one who gets no love. I want to say one last thing, if any of you, Alfred, Dad, Papa, if I can still call you that, are reading this I want you three to remember these last words, __It's all your faults._

_From Matthew Williams _

This is the note I wrote to my family the day I decided to end it all. I'm here to tell you why I did kill myself so let's begin.

When I was young before Alfred was adopted my life was grand. I was the centre of attention then he came along, Alfred, oh I'll admit that I was jealous, but isn't everyone, I still loved him. For our family life, well growing it was ok, but as Alfred came along life changed we had less money barley enough to get by, but we did.

Now here's where the story really begins when I was around 12.

"Come on Alfred were going to be late," I called to my brother trying to hurry him up.

"I'm coming just hold your horses," he answered well running down the hall with his blond hair looking messy with its one unruly cowlick sticking straight up.

I sighed, and opened the door walking out. A few seconds later I heard the door shut, and saw from the corner of my eye Alfred walking beside me.

After a few minutes of walking I could sense her looking at me so I asked, " What is there something on my face?" my hands rushing to cover my face.

"No I was just thinking," He smiled a big open mouth toothy smile.


	2. Chapter 2

**I**_** don't own April Raintree or Hetalia this is my first fanfic so tell me what you think and if I need to l work on anything this was originaly a school project after we read April Raintree we wrote a first person story from Aprils view as if she never went into foster care and this is my story with the characters changed to FACE family and other Hetalia cast **_

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_**At School Recess**_

I watched all my classmates at recess mingle and play together. I never joined in, I was different, I didn't look like everyone else. I had purple eyes which people thought was weird. Sadly, I thought today would be like any other day,_ ( ha I can laugh about that now, but no that day was the day that would change my life_ _forever). _Well you see I'm used to being ignored, and every now and then getting a rude taunt from someone, ah well you'll see.

The teacher called to tell us that recess was over, I got up and started to walk back to school keeping my head down, with my face hidden behind curtain of my chin length blond hair, trying to avoid everyone. When I was half way to the door someone stuck their foot out in front of me I did not have enough time to react, so i tripped over their foot.

" Hey brat you fell on my foot that hurt," the boy said holding me up by the hair.

" I...I...I'm sorry," I apologized, whimpering in fear and pain.

"I don't think that was very sincere," the boy Will sneered, "hold him still," he ordered as he pushed me into the waiting arms of his cronies.

I struggled to get away, but it was already too late , I could feel the other boys fingers dig into my shoulders.

"Now to get a little payback bastard," Will smiled, not one of those nice smiles no this was the smile the villain gave before killing some one.

His cronies laughed and smirked down at me.

That's when it all went from bad to worse. I felt Will's foot come down on my ankle, and then there was that sickening sound which sounded so loud in the silence.

'Crack'

The boys let go of me, which allowed me to fall to the ground in pain.

"See you later bastard," they laughed as they began to walk away I looked up and through my by bangs I saw my brother sneering down at me before walking away as well. I stayed on the ground with silent tears leaving tear tracks on my face. After a few minutes I got up and limped to class.


	3. Chapter 3

**I**_** don't own April Raintree or Hetalia this is my first fanfic so tell me what you think and if I need to l work on anything this was originaly a school project after we read April Raintree we wrote a first person story from Aprils view as if she never went into foster care and this is my story with the characters changed to FACE family and other Hetalia cast **_

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**Classroom**

"Matthew Williams, where were you recess was over ten minutes ago?" Glared the teacher.

"I didn't hear sorry," I whispered.

"Ugh go to your seat, and open your book to page five we're on question ten," She sneered down at me.

I limped over to my seat keeping my eyes to the floor with my hair hiding my face from everyone. When I sat down the teacher began talking again, but I was not listening anymore.

_"You're very weak aren't you," laughed a boy's voice, "You know I'm right you're just a waste."_

I looked around the class but no one around me was talking.

_Weird must have been my imagination_, I thought as I focussed in on the lesson.

Little did I know then was that voice was much more sinister then I thought and it would come again.


	4. Chapter 4

**I**_** don't own April Raintree or Hetalia this is my first fanfic so tell me what you think and if I need to l work on anything this was originaly a school project after we read April Raintree we wrote a first person story from Aprils view as if she never went into foster care and this is my story with the characters changed to FACE family and other Hetalia cast **_

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**A few years later: Age 16**

"Again, Matthew we just got a call from your school, you were fighting again," my 'Dad' yelled at me.

"That wasn't me I swear," I pleaded.

'Smack' my head was whipped to the side my ears rung from the smack then my hand flew towards my face holding the stinging cheek that was smacked.

"Don't talk back child," he growled at me before walking out the door towards the car waiting for 'papa'.

I turned towards my 'papa', with a pleading look in my eyes; all I got from him was a look of disgust.

"Alfred, me and your father are leaving now, the food money-," he turned to look at me, "well you know where it is, be good." He turned and walked out of the house without so much as another look at me.

I walked away to my room passing by my brother who I refused to look at. Alfred seemed to be trying to say some to me but I slammed my bedroom door in his face.

_"Oh you poor child that must have hurt," giggled the voice who I started to call Matthieu, "oh you're still not talking to me humph," Matthieu pouted. _

I sighed over the years I got used to Matthieu's voice being in my head. I got up and locked my door after that I closed the window blinds. After that was all done I walked over to my closet opening it, I began to push things aside until I got to the very back, where if you looked very closely you might be able to see a little sliding door. I opened the door and pulled out a box again looking around to make sure the door and window blinds were shut I slowly began to open the box.

_"Hurry up Matthew, you know you need to do this come on you know you need this," Matthieu spoke in a sickeningly sweet voice that dripped with poison._

"Yeah I know I'm getting to it," I whispered to Matthieu as I pulled out a small pocket knife that I stole from my 'dad' four years ago.

_He still hasn't noticed that it's gone; though I suppose I should be thankful that he hasn't, _I shook my head, _focus Matthew focus._

I placed the knife down and rolled up my shirt sleeves, both my arms were covered in white gauze. I raised one hand and began to unwrap the gauze on my right arm then I did the same on my left arm.

When I finished getting all the gauze off I stopped and looked down at my arms. All along my arms you could see the criss cross of scars over scars; there were more all over my body the marks of my imperfection. They would be with me forever reminding me that I am a mistake that I never should have been allowed to live. I cut to try to repent for my sins but it never seemed to work no matter how many times I tried.

_"Why don't you take a picture of them it'll last longer," Matthieu giggled at his joke._

"Give me a minute," I muttered under my breath to him.

I got up and made sure everything was locked before sitting down on my hard wood floor and lifting the knife .I stuck out my left arm and lowered the blade before slashing it across my arm.

I watched as the blood oozed out of the cut.

"What a pretty color_,"_ I giggled.

I brought the knife down four more times on my left arm and slashed my right arm five tomes also before I started to get light headed.

"I guess that's enough for today," I swayed side to side slowly wrapping fresh gauze around my arms.

_"Oh come on a few more come on it'll be fine," pleaded Matthieu._

_That does sound nice,_ I thought slowing down wrapping my arms.

"No," I spoke out loud, "in a few days ok Matthieu but this is enough for now almost a little too much."

_"Humph fine, fine whatever, but you promise to do it again," Matthieu asked like a child asking a parent to promise to take them to the store._

I giggled quietly with a slight smile on my face I haven't truly smiled in four years since this all began, "yes, yes I promise Matthieu don't worry."

The slight smile slipped from my face as I thought, _I'll never stop doing this it's the only thing that allows me to feel alive._


	5. Chapter 5

**I**_** don't own April Raintree or Hetalia this is my first fanfic so tell me what you think and if I need to l work on anything this was originaly a school project after we read April Raintree we wrote a first person story from Aprils view as if she never went into foster care and this is my story with the characters changed to FACE family and other Hetalia cast **_

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**Later**

After I finished rewrapping my arms and cleaning up the blood that fell on the ground, I walked out of my room wobbling slightly from blood loss I made my way down the hall, into the kitchen.

"Hey Matthew you ok?" my brother asked with fake concern.

"Leave me the f*** alone Alfred," I growled out at him.

Alfred shook his head, "fine, go die in a hole then for all I care we'll be happier without you," he stomped away to his room.

_'See Matthew he admitted it that everyone would be happier without you, you want to make them happy right…?'_

I ignored Matthieu, and began searching through the kitchen for some food.

_ These well do. _I decided when I found some frozen pizza in the back.

After heating it up and eating it I wandered back to my room to read a book. I opened the door to my room.


	6. Chapter 6

**I**_** don't own April Raintree or Hetalia this is my first fanfic so tell me what you think and if I need to l work on anything this was originaly a school project after we read April Raintree we wrote a first person story from Aprils view as if she never went into foster care and this is my story with the characters changed to FACE family and other Hetalia cast **_

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**Room**

"Merde I forgot to put it away," I mentally slapped myself for doing something so stupid, I then began to pick up all my medical supplies well putting them back into their box. After putting the box back into the secret compartment of my closet I moved some random things back over the compartment then remembering the lack of some supplies I left my room.

Walking out of my room my feet took me towards the door, "I'm going out, be back later," I called back into the house as I opened the door.

_Not that you care where I go anyway._ I thought angrily.


	7. Chapter 7

**I**_** don't own April Raintree or Hetalia this is my first fanfic so tell me what you think and if I need to l work on anything this was originaly a school project after we read April Raintree we wrote a first person story from Aprils view as if she never went into foster care and this is my story with the characters changed to FACE family and other Hetalia cast **_

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**In town**

I stayed in the shadows as I walked through our small town towards the 24-7 drug store a few blocks from our home.

"Ouch," I muttered under my breath as someone walked into me.

"Watch where you're going kid," The person grumbled walking away.

I stood still for a few more minutes before continuing my walk. When I got there I was lucky that it was pretty much empty, the only people being there were a grandmother, a young boy most likely her grandchild and the store clerk who looked like he didn't want to be there at all. Wandering through the store I found my way to the medical department. I started to go through my mental list of things I need grabbing them well I mentally checked them off. When I was sure I had all the supplies I walked to the front of the store well keeping my head down.

After paying for the supplies I left the store and began the walk home.


	8. Chapter 8

**I**_** don't own April Raintree or Hetalia this is my first fanfic so tell me what you think and if I need to l work on anything this was originaly a school project after we read April Raintree we wrote a first person story from Aprils view as if she never went into foster care and this is my story with the characters changed to FACE family and other Hetalia cast **_

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**A few years later Age 18**

Two years went by from the day my so called 'father' slapped me. My family life became even more stressed, to the point where I couldn't stay in the same room as any of them for even a minute without a fight breaking out, one time it was so bad our nosey neighbours called the cops on us. Since that moment I truly knew that Matthieu was right I wasn't part of this family anymore and never would be.

I took to hiding in my room more and more with only Matthieu to talk to.

_'It's ok Matthew I'll always be there for you,' Matthieu crooned after a particular bad day._

"Thanks Matthieu I know you'll always be there for me," I smiled an empty smile.

The "box" sat in front of me, my arms where naked of the usual gauze allowing the criss crossof scars over scars. Over the years my body began to fill with scars to the point where the only part empty of scars was my face. I would cut my face if I could but Matthieu said that if I did that then they would lock me up.

I lifted the new knife that I began to use it was a six inch saturated knife that I stole from the nearby general store a year ago. I held the knife up in my right hand looking at the scars that traveled up and down my arms. I moved my eyes away from my arms and up to the knife marvelling at the way the light glinted off of it. Then I brought it down cutting the length of both my arms again marvelling at the flow of blood as it dripped down my arms, slowly I rewrapped my arms almost like a puppet.

_'Why do you keep torturing yourself,' Matthieu cooed, 'why don't you end it?'_

"I…I…I…I'm scared to die I don't want to die yet," I cried out bring my knees up to my chest and crying into my arms.

_In my head Matthieu smirked, 'soon Matthew you'll be free soon.'_


	9. Chapter 9

**I**_** don't own April Raintree or Hetalia this is my first fanfic so tell me what you think and if I need to l work on anything this was originaly a school project after we read April Raintree we wrote a first person story from Aprils view as if she never went into foster care and this is my story with the characters changed to FACE family and other Hetalia cast **_

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**Christmas Eve**

I watched my family from the shadows that throughout the years became my new home. I watched as they smiled and made plans for the evening.

"I hope you love your present Alfred," smiled my 'papa'.

"I know I'll love it Papa it's from my family after all," Alfredl hugged them and smiled.

" Ho, ho, ho," my 'dad' laughed as if he was Santa, " I'll be right back with some cookies and milk then we can watch some Christmas movies." He said as he began to walk towards the kitchen door, the very room I was in right now.

As soon as he walked into the room he caught sight of me and grimaced, then pretending he didn't see me he prepared a tray of cookies and milk. Then he headed back towards the rest of the family.

As I headed towards my room I could hear their jolly laughter. Sitting in my room I talked to Matthieu.

_Are you ready now to hear what I have to say my little Matthew ' Matthieu murmured softly._

I leant back against my bed looking up at my ceiling before answering.

I sighed, "Yes I'm ready to listen to you now."

_'I knew you would come around," he smiled softly._


	10. Chapter 10

**I**_** don't own April Raintree or Hetalia this is my first fanfic so tell me what you think and if I need to l work on anything this was originaly a school project after we read April Raintree we wrote a first person story from Aprils view as if she never went into foster care and this is my story with the characters changed to FACE family and other Hetalia cast **_

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**Christmas**

The night before Avril told me what we would do at first I was scared, then after I decided that she was right that it would make them happy, and I do want to make my family happy.

When I awoke I walked out of my room to see if anyone was still around, they were all gone probably out with family and friends.

_'They're gone I told you that they don't care,' Matthieu whispered, 'come Matthew it's time to get ready.'_

I nodded my head, "yes I know Matthieu," I told him as I wandered back to my room to dress.


	11. Chapter 11

**I**_** don't own April Raintree or Hetalia this is my first fanfic so tell me what you think and if I need to l work on anything this was originaly a school project after we read April Raintree we wrote a first person story from Aprils view as if she never went into foster care and this is my story with the characters changed to FACE family and other Hetalia cast **_

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**A few minutes later**

I looked around my room one last time knowing I wouldn't be coming back, I smiled sadly as I remembered all the good times I had before.

I laughed bitterly smile vanishing from my face, 'what good times,' I thought sadly.

After making sure everything was fine I walked out into our small yard looking around I saw no one. After making sure no one was around I allowed my feet to take me to the shed. When I got to the shed I opened the door and rummaged around until I found what I was looking for, a long coil of thick rope.

_'Perfect,' Matthieu giggled insanely._

I didn't answer as I wandered over to the lone tree in our yard, you could only see the tree If you entered the yard which made it perfect.

Walking over to the tree I began to tie a noose, when the noose was complete, I turned towards the house.

"Good bye, I hope you can all be happy now," I said as I pulled out the note I wrote the night before. I walked back into the house and placed the note right where I knew they would all see it as soon as they entered. When that was complete I left the house for the finale time.

_'It's time Matthew, it's time to give them their present,' Matthieu told me._

"Yes, it's time," I answered as I made my way back to the tree.

I climbed up the tree and placed the noose around my neck, "Good bye," I whispered into the wind.

Then I jumped I could feel to rope tighten around my neck stopping my breath in my throat.

_'Goodbye Matthew it's complete,' Matthieu whispered._

Those words were the last things I heard before it all went black.

Now that is the end of my tale.

**_The End_**


End file.
